Captain America: Civil War (12A)

Captain America returns to the big screen to fight his most formidable opponent yet…Iron Man.

After the Avengers cause an accident of ridiculous magnitude a shitstorm ensues. The collateral damage is so bad that the government is brought in to keep the superheroes in line. They propose a new governing body that will dictate when and where the Avengers can help people, all while monitoring their every move.

Rather out of character Tony Stark decides that this is the right path for the team, but Steve Rogers doesn’t agree. As you can imagine Tony doesn’t like losing and so a conflict between Iron Man and Captain America ensues. This leaves the other Avengers in the tricky position of choosing which side to take.

In among all this drama the Cap’s old buddy Buckie makes a return. But the Russians have weaponised him so he’s not exactly himself. Utter a sequence of numbers and phrases and he goes apeshit. Captain America can see that his friend is being controlled, but Iron Man can’t. This just adds to the tension between the two patriarchs of the Avengers.

Iron Man will fight anyone to protect the Avengers and Captain America is prepared to die trying to save Buckie. But as the two superheroes play fisticuffs a new enemy is emerging who is deadset on destroying the world. Will they sort their issues out before the world goes kaput? We’ll have to wait and see.

This superhero-studded blockbuster has made a mockery of Mark Millar comic book. This movie is supposed to be darker and more emotional than its predecessors, but instead it’s sloppy and irrelevant.

Watch out for appearances from Hawkeye, the lamest of the Avengers gang, Scarlet Witch, Vision, Black Widow, Falcon and War Machine. The team also brings in some backup to help with the superhero showdown.

However they fail to bring in anyone that could actually put an end to the fighting like oh I don’t know Thor or The Hulk. Instead the team has to make do with smart-ass Ant-Man, prepubescent Spider-Man and hate-filled Black Panther.

Captain America: Civil War is about as interesting as an Antiques Roadshow marathon in the middle of summer. It’s a spectacle but not the good kind that Marvel were hoping for. Don’t expect an epic showdown, a cohesive storyline or any sense of action and you won’t be disappointed.

By Ruth Walker

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