Bastille Day (15)

When a terrorist threat in Paris reaches new heights the CIA bring in a covert operative to deal with the situation. Little do they know that all hell is about to break loose.

Former CIA agent Sean Briar is tasked with dealing with the delicate situation in Paris. That involves hunting down a young con artist named Michael Mason (Richard Madden) and establishing his involvement in a recent bombing in the capital.

Mason is as wily as Brair is strong so the inevitable chase scene is quite a spectacle. Interrogation reveals that the young criminal was just in the wrong place at the wrong time. So Briar’s focus shifts to finding a young girl named Zoe Naville (Charlotte Le Bon) who is believed to be connected with the terrorist group responsible for the bombing.

Briar takes Mason along for the ride and soon enough we have the world’s weirdest double-act. The plot thickens further when the duo tracks down Zoe.

As political pressure mounts for Briar to complete his anti-terrorism mission, so does the manhunt for Mason. With his rookie in tow Briar uncovers details of dirty cops and a corrupt government, putting his CIA taskforce and new-found comrades in jeopardy.

But he’s just scratched the surface and is determined to see just how deep the deception goes. Briar is willing to risk everything to expose the truth.

This ham-fisted laughable attempt at an action movie sees Idris Elba and Richard Madden racing through a ridiculous plot with all the grace of a two tonne elephant.

Their acting is so unbelievably wooden that it quickly transforms the movie from terrorist thriller to action-comedy. Idris Elba seems to have used all his energy up in The Jungle Book because he certainly doesn’t bring any to Bastille Day. The fight scenes are more like a bust-up after a few pints than a trained operative showing off his expertise.

Game of Thrones’ Richard Madden is equally terrible. He shows little to no interest in his role as though he already knows the movie is going to tank. He’s hapless and Elba is super-macho. It just doesn’t work. To make matter worse Charlotte Le Bon sporadically forgets that her character is French and shifts back into a London accent. Even Sherlock Holmes’ Kelly Reilly can’t save the day; instead she just adds more hammy acting to the mix.

So it’s no surprise that Bastille Day is getting a frostier reception than a hoard of white walkers. Haters are coming.

Want my advice? Don’t bother going to see it. It’s an utterly ridiculous movie, and not that kind that makes it funny. It’s just plain terrible.

By Ruth Walker
★☆☆☆☆

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